Simply Thriving

New Year’s Eve.  Resolution day. The night before Clean-Slate Day.  Stay-up-later-than-you-should Day. Ok, no more “creative names”. What is New Year’s Eve like for you? We had a tradition when I was growing up. Every New Year’s Eve, Mom, Dad and I would go out for supper to Street’s Eatery in my hometown of Petrolia, Ontario. I would order a panzerotti.  It would come to the table steaming, delicious and much, much too big for me. (If you haven’t had a panzerotti, you should – basically a giant, homemade pizza pocket.) The point of our trips to Streets Eatery was to read the previous year’s resolutions (usually I saw how I had failed to lose weight and keep a clean bedroom) and to make new resolutions for the next year. Mom had a special journal for the event and it was actually quite exciting – especially if one of us had resolution victory. Once I left home, I kept a page at the end of my journal for just such purposes for a few years, but now, aside f...

Yesterday, our pastor preached an excellent sermon on 2 Chronicles 14-16. It was about having an undivided heart and finishing as well as you start out. One verse in particular has been running through my mind ever since - 2 Chronicles 16:9: “For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” Pastor Kim asked, “What is dividing your heart? Your attention?” Wow! About a million things. But seriously, there truly are a myriad of things running through my mind at any given moment. Even as he preached I had to use a great amount of self-control not to dwell on how smoothly the song service had gone, the fact that Aiden was likely driving his teacher crazy somewhere in the church, the possibility of Josh shooting another deer while I was sitting here, the events that I had planned for the week and how great so-and-so’s scarf was. Sad, right? And that’s just the little stuff. How many hours do I spend worrying? How o...

Gifts from this weekend: ~ the first real snow; absolutely beautiful! ~ holding baby Jude, the newest addition to the cousin clan ~ baby shower for baby Elizabeth; baby girl showers are so much fun!  ~ our first Sunday at our new church; so excited to get to know everyone there.  ~ mass meal making with Renee; 13 suppers for $100? Um, yes!  ~ clomping through the snow in new winter boots ~ the "I'm sorry" card from Gage; so cute!  ~ quick Sunday afternoon trip out to the country to see Josh's family ~ backyard cleaned before the snow ~ the first gingerbread latte of the season ~ did I mention the snowfall??? 

Today hasn't been a good day. It’s been one of “those” days. There have been many things on my mind. Things that have been pushed back for a while, but need to be faced at some point. On top of that, we are all especially impatient and grumpy. The kids have been fighting non-stop about the tiniest things and I've been counting down the hours until bedtime for hours already. In fact, at this point, EVERYTHING that the kids say and do is rubbing me the wrong way and I would give anything for a quiet, uninterrupted 20 minutes to myself. And in my frustration, as I focus on all that has to be done, all that is happening in my home and around me that seems unfair and maddening, I’m reminded of something that I read yesterday: “You would be very ashamed if you knew what the experiences you call setbacks, upheavals, pointless disturbances, and tedious annoyances really are. You would realize that your complaints about them are nothing more nor less than blasphemies...

It’s Halloween and you know what that means: all sorts of hype and excitement, candy, decorations, opinions, histories, fears and beliefs. I have read so many articles this past week, some of which passionately list all of the evils of the day and some of which vehemently defend it. The day is like an onion. There are so many layers and meanings and motives and I’ll be the first to say that I have not researched it as much as I should. But, there is one thing that I do know: Today was NOT Satan’s day! Today is the day that the Lord has made. It's the Lord's day! Whether you closed your doors or opened them, whether you went out our stayed in, whether you went to a church function, dressed yourself or your kids up or went to bed early is between you and God, but whatever you did, remember: Today is God’s day! A day to rejoice in the fact that death has been swallowed up in victory! Here is the passage that best represented my perspective toward all of the “death” t...

This morning the kids made caramel apples for their friends at playgroup and this afternoon they finally got to sample their creations. Were they ever excited about it! And, my goodness, I had forgotten how much of a mess they are! Just like life: A sweet, sticky mess.   It’s complicated and messy, full of emotions and misunderstandings and joys. It’s friendship and crazy amounts of grace given and received.  It’s ideals and truth and knowing when you are the one in the wrong and when to just let something go. In the same way that the kids have to get caramel ALL OVER their faces and fingers in order to enjoy their treat, we can’t experience the joy of love, friendship and faith without the messy of everyday life. After all, that’s what heaven is about  ! In the meantime, we just have to grab that apple and take a giant, sticky bite!   

It’s been a weepy few days. I’m not really sure why. Yesterday, I cried so much that I almost made myself laugh at the sheer volume of it. Even little Chloe was looking at me compassionately (if that’s possible). As far as I know, nothing was really wrong; there was just much remembering and general wistfulness happening. A friend had put up a beautiful post in memory of her lost baby, but even before that I caught myself clinging to Chloe and praying for friends who have lost their sweet babies and wondering how I would survive if I lost mine. Sometimes the love I have for my kids is so great that it’s almost debilitating. If I let myself think about all that could go wrong, my heart is constricting and I’m crying like there is no tomorrow! This morning, my heart still felt very tender (and I have to be especially careful on days like today, because I know how easy it is for me to go to a dark place if I don’t guard my thoughts). I basically was just praying, “Help! I can feel “i...

Do you remember what it was like to be five years old and have a sleepover? I have vague memories of whispering in bed, hoping that mom wouldn't hear, and yet somehow she always did. It’s weird being on the other end now. Being an adult and hearing your five year old and her friend whispering together. Weird and pretty cool. It was pretty cool too, until 2:45am, when those same sweet girls decided to wake me up to check if it was time to play yet. And again, over and over until 5:30am when they had woken up the baby and I finally gave up and said, “Yes, go play, but there will be a consequence for this.” At the time, they were so excited to get up and play that a consequence seemed like no big deal. But, a few hours later, when the rest of the house was awake and the girls realized that their “all-day-play date” was now canceled, the tears began to flow. And not just for them. Now their litter brothers couldn't have a play date either and neither could we Mama’s. Sud...

I don’t have much to say today but that we are enjoying this peaceful,beautiful fall day. The kids have been doing a TON of coloring and are excited to have a friend sleeping over tonight.   I thought I would simply jot down a few gifts based off of Ann Voskamp’s Joy dare template. Today’s “prompt” is Gifts Enjoying: 1.) A lengthy (with only one interruption) shower during nap time. 2.) During my shower, I used the last of the shampoo that my sister forgot/left here from her visit this summer. Every time I walk into the bathroom, I see it and smile, thinking of her. 3.) Pumpkin, Apple and Sugar plum candles that Em and Daddy surprised me with when they went shopping. 4.) Emily and Aiden chatting with each other while doing crafts. So sweet. 5.) Jeans fitting looser than they did three weeks ago! Yay! 6.) Phone conversations with friends. There are so many more now that I’m on FB less. 7.) Plans for the weekend. Always exciting. 8.) Our last Sunday at Fort...

It’s that time again (almost). It’s (almost) the most wonderful time of the year…..CHRISTMAS!!! Maybe it’s because the forecast is calling for snow on Sunday and the Christmas catalogues have already started arriving in the mail or perhaps it’s because November is just a few days away and I’ve barely begun tackling my shopping list, but whatever the reason, I’m full swing into the Christmas spirit (I know you are groaning and sighing at this, but indulge me). I want this year to be special! Last year our funds were really low and yet, instead of that causing me to want to “make up for it” this year, it helped me to realize just how happy you can be when the gifts are gone. As a result, this year we are going to keep it simple and try to participate in a LOT more ministry minded and Christ-centered activities. The kids are already pumped to do shoe boxes. I know that it’ll be a challenge, choosing gifts that they would love and giving them away, but I think it’s such a beau...

It’s 11:30. The kids come upstairs to find out what we are having for lunch. When I say, “KD and hot dogs”, two kids bounce up and down, excited at the menu, while the third’s shoulders slump as he skulks across the room and whines, “KD again? I don’t want KD again!! ”. Fast forward to later in the day. It’s time to clean up the basement. As it’s a pretty big job, there is a reward for those who help out.  Two kids start picking up toys and racing to see who can get their piles picked up the fastest while the third mopes around asking what the reward will be and crying about how much he doesn’t want to clean up. When reward time comes and his treat is smaller (according to how much he helped out) it’s full blown melt down time. At supper, he doesn't get the cup that he wants and ends up in his room over the scene that he makes. At bedtime, his brother is wearing what are all of a sudden his favorite pajamas. At prayer time, he wants to go first and so refuses to ...

Two days ago our computer cord went on the fritz and so I've been forced to take a “technology fast”.  I’m actually quite excited about it. I had been thinking some time about taking a couple weeks “off” and now I get three! My plan is to write up some thoughts for the day and Josh (who is such an amazing husband to do this) will type them up and post them on his lunch break. And so, thoughts from day one: Today was a good day, weird to be so "un-connected", but good. It was the sort of day when I chase life around with my camera, cuddle the kids a bunch and listen to some great music (Today’s choice was a new Christmas CD. Judge me all you like! After being flat on my back, sick for a week, Christmas music seemed like just the thing.) One thing about being “unplugged” is that I found a ton of extra time to think, so I found myself thinking and praying about something that has been on my heart for a while. Self-esteem. This thanksgiving, at Josh’s paren...

Today was a heavy-hearted day. A day when our brother and sister in Christ laid their sweet baby, Selah’s, body to rest in the ground; a day when tears flow freely and prayers even more so.   A day for remembering. For those of us who have loved and lost, days like today stir up the memories and the ache that are not so far below the surface in our hearts. Perhaps it was your own precious baby, lost before term, like mine that you miss and wonder at what might have been. Maybe you were blessed to hold your little one in your arms and yet ache to have them in there just one more time. Maybe your best friend died in a car crash in high school or your loved one passed away before she could see you walk down the aisle or hold your first baby. Perhaps it isn’t a loved one that you have lost, but rather your health or your home or your security. For all of us there is a future that cannot be and our hearts break for the lack of it. And what has be pressing on my heavy heart ...

Little kids are the best! As I looked out my kitchen window this past weekend, I could see mine climbing to the top of the trellis in our back yard, no thought whatsoever to the 6+ foot high drop that they would have if they fell. They had their sights set on the last of the bright red crab apples that they could only reach from the very top of the trellis. And that’s just like them. Whether it’s rolling out the entire roll of toilet paper just to see how far it goes Or squishing their fingers into the margarine Hiding the van keys in the peanut butter jar for a joke Or coloring beautiful “paintings” on their bedroom walls If it’s rubbing sand into each other’s hair at the playground Or eating an entire tube of berry scented lip chap because it “tastes sooo good Mommy” If they are building forts with the entire contents of their dresser Digging up real flowers at other people’s houses when we go visiting Pushing noodles up into their noses because they feel s...

Today, as I cleaned the bathroom, picking up underwear, gathering stray bath toys and scrubbing away at toothpaste dribbles, I chuckled to myself at the thought that “Motherhood is not for the faint of heart”. It’s a hard working, back-aching, around the clock affair that no amount of preparation can actually prepare you for. The same goes for so many things. Parenting, love, marriage, singleness, work, physical limitations: the list could go on forever. Ultimately, one could say that life itself is not for the faint of heart. Or is it? As I stood scrubbing toothpaste, I decided that life and motherhood ARE for the faint in heart. They ARE for the weak, for the weary, for the unprepared. The truth is that on my own, I can’t muster the desire or the energy to get up again every morning and prepare another breakfast that will make yet another set of dishes that will mean yet another day started with my hands in the sink. On my own, I simply don’t have the desir...

One size fits all? Ya right! Dreaded words to hear when you, realistically, don’t fit that “one-size-fits-all” mold. Interestingly, the more open I am about my “image issues”, to more I realize that we are all the same. My “flawless” friends, the ones that some days I think I would give anything to be, are often just as insecure about their bodies as I am. I guess it’s part of being a woman. (Maybe a man too, I really don’t know since I’m not one.) Wishing for straighter hair, wavier hair, longer legs, slimmer hands, fuller lips, higher forehead, smaller feet…I could go on forever!! Never fully satisfied, never fully accepting what we've got. For my part, yes, a health change is necessary (and something that I've been convicted about lately), but that’s not my point here. My point is that I tend to think that I’m the only one. The only one too big for the one size fits all sweater. The only one who worries that my husband won’t be proud to be with me....